Tammy,
I am so excited to write to you. I would love to start a community support group for caregivers. I have been caregiving for quite awhile...first my husband during his illness till he passed away, then my father, and now my mother. I love taking care of my family, but I do get overwhelmed, and lonely at times.
My biggest frustration has been my feeling of resentment towards my siblings, their attitude that it is my obligation, that they don't have to be a part of this.
They contribute money to Mom's financial situation, but it ends there.
Thanks for your wonderful website.
Lindsay
HomeBoundResources.com
Tammy I. Glenn, Founder and CEO
Welcome Caregivers!
(To skip to this week's post, scroll down...)
Special needs situations, like those we find in a home healthcare setting, demand special responses.
The fact that you’ve registered to participate in this blog is a sign that you are in a special needs situation. You are probably under a tremendous amount of stress and strain – both physically and emotionally – and you probably feel very alone right now.
Take heart…you are not alone.
For what it’s worth, the National Family Caregivers Association (visit their website at www.thefamilycaregiver.org/about/) estimates that there are approximately 54 million people in the nation currently caring for someone in need.It’s not an easy road, and that’s why I’ve created HomeBoundResources.com.
Let's not reinvent the wheel. Together, as a community, we are the experts in collecting and sharing the most important resources, information, and help for people who are challenged by a home healthcare situation.I really do care about how caregivers and patients achieve the highest standard of living possible. To that end, I recently introduced contributing writers as part of Tammy's Think Tank Team. Everybody benefits by a little help from their friends! Look for interesting articles on Fitness, Relationship Dynamics, Mobility, Overcoming Challenges. If you have an issue that needs addressed, let us know. You'd be surprised by the creative solutions people use!
I understand that every situation is different, and good advice in one situation may not be so appropriate in another. So, please let us know what’s working and what’s not. Visit http://www.homeboundresources.com/, and explore the tips, resources and publications available.
And, if you’ve got some advice of your own on a topic that I’ve written about, please feel free to e-mail your feedback to me. This effort works best when we all help each other.
From My Heart to Yours,
Tammy
Tammy@HomeBoundResources.com
Special needs situations, like those we find in a home healthcare setting, demand special responses.
The fact that you’ve registered to participate in this blog is a sign that you are in a special needs situation. You are probably under a tremendous amount of stress and strain – both physically and emotionally – and you probably feel very alone right now.
Take heart…you are not alone.
For what it’s worth, the National Family Caregivers Association (visit their website at www.thefamilycaregiver.org/about/) estimates that there are approximately 54 million people in the nation currently caring for someone in need.It’s not an easy road, and that’s why I’ve created HomeBoundResources.com.
Let's not reinvent the wheel. Together, as a community, we are the experts in collecting and sharing the most important resources, information, and help for people who are challenged by a home healthcare situation.I really do care about how caregivers and patients achieve the highest standard of living possible. To that end, I recently introduced contributing writers as part of Tammy's Think Tank Team. Everybody benefits by a little help from their friends! Look for interesting articles on Fitness, Relationship Dynamics, Mobility, Overcoming Challenges. If you have an issue that needs addressed, let us know. You'd be surprised by the creative solutions people use!
I understand that every situation is different, and good advice in one situation may not be so appropriate in another. So, please let us know what’s working and what’s not. Visit http://www.homeboundresources.com/, and explore the tips, resources and publications available.
And, if you’ve got some advice of your own on a topic that I’ve written about, please feel free to e-mail your feedback to me. This effort works best when we all help each other.
From My Heart to Yours,
Tammy
Tammy@HomeBoundResources.com
Thursday, February 10, 2011
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Dear Lindsay,
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the most common challenges I hear from the HomeBoundResources community. Oftentimes, it's the sibling who is unmarried and doesn't have children who is handed the responsibility of caregiving. More often than not, I tend to hear it's the youngest of the siblings who has yet to get married and have their own family. Imagine the impact it has on that individual's ability to visualize and pursue life dreams.
In some ways, you're fortunate that your siblings offer financial support. Many siblings do not, or in the worst case scenarios, they take advantage of an ill parent's resources for their own benefit.
Have you considered asking them to schedule some routine visits that would give you time off--not just during the week, but for one to two week vacation periods?
That would be my starting point. To avoid being too disappointed, I wouldn't set my expectations very high. Who knows, maybe they'll surprise you!
Tammy,
ReplyDeleteMy last posting, I was at my wits end for help. You suggested I ask for some vacation time or a day off once in a while..You also told me not to have high expectations.. You were so right.. I have not heard a word since I brought up the subject of a day off..I spoke with my sister of the possibility
of some telephone calls, and kind words.., and the possibility of time away.. not just for me, but also for Mom..We both could use a breather from one another..
I haven't hear anything since then.. So I keep on doing what I have to do, and try not to be hurt by the silence..
I believe that my siblings are afraid to deal with the reality, that their Mother has gotten older, and they have a hard time accepting it. We all lost our dad almost 2 years ago now, and to have the reality, that Mom may not be around forever is too hard to handle, so let Lindsay be in control, she has always been more grounded in home matters.
Thank you for the opportunity to write this blog, and hope this helps others going through similar sibing difficulties.. Lindsay
Tammy,
ReplyDeleteSo much has happened since I posted last..
I was frustrated, and becoming very burned out.. My last post, you suggested I ask for some relief from my siblings.. If you don't ask, no one will know what you need..I was feeling alone, and left to fend for myself..
So I asked.. Last week my sister invited me to the beach for a week in July..
I know this will be good for Mom and Me..we both need a break.. from each other..
Having this Blog to write, is such a blessing..I would like to invite your other followers to join me in creating a community to support each other..
Tammy,
ReplyDeleteThank You for the interesting article on organizing Medical Billing..
I am in the process of working with a financial advisor , to aid Mom with
Veterans benefits.. something we didn't even knew existed until recently..
Pulling together all her Medical Bills and Receipts for supplies has been a bit overwhelming.. These tips should be so helpful..
Lindsay